Fire Chief

Verna Wilson intently rubbed a piece of paper over a large brass plaque, while Elizabeth Desideri held the paper in place.

Wilson’s son, 30-year-old Shawn Patrick Blazer, was one of eight Forest Service contractors killed in a helicopter crash on Aug. 5, 2008. His name was among those listed on the 2008 fallen firefighters’ plaque unveiled at the NFFF’s memorial weekend.

I attended my first memorial weekend this year. I had shied away from going in previous years because I cry easily and I feared the sadness — when I hear the Last Alarm or bagpipers playing Amazing Grace, I crumble. But when I finally went, it wasn’t the sound of bells or the bagpipes that touched me — it was the overwhelming compassion from volunteers who want to make a difference to the families who had just lost loved ones.

Anita Reynolds, who works for the Fairfax County (Va.) Fire Department, has volunteered for four years. Her tasks ranged from spraying for the annoying bees to passing out tissue packets to drying the chairs before the early morning ceremony. “We try and make [the families’] weekend as smooth and problem-free as possible,” Reynolds said.

Chief Bob Dipoli first volunteered in 1990, serving as an escort or caretaker for a family. “I was coming for the Executive Fire Officer program, and they were looking for uniformed escorts to assist a family from upstate New York,” Dipoli said. He became the escort coordinator and eventually became one of the presenters of the American flag, medal and a red rose, given to each new family during the ceremony.

At the ceremony, 457 motorcycles led by a police escort rode up from Fredericks, Md., under a large American flag suspended from two aerial ladders to place a wreath at the memorial.

I also met Frank and Stephanie Thompson, whose son Brandon Thompson was killed in the Charleston Sofa Super Store Fire. “Last year was a blur for me,” Frank Thompson said. “I bought my tickets several months ago and told [the NFFF] I was coming back.”

Stephanie Thompson said that being able to talk to other survivors made a big difference in her ability to get through the grief.

“Two of our sons are police officers and we worried about their safety,” she said. “Being a firefighter, we thought Brandon would be fine.”

During the candlelight program, Dennis Compton addressed the 2,000-person gathering. “We will help in any way to help you to re-build your lives,” he said. “We are here to help and support you — it’s that simple.”

In the benediction of the candlelight service, Chaplain Ted Wilson, Oklahoma City Fire Department offered, “The amount of pain corresponds with the love that we have.”

And there was no shortage of love at the memorial. The survivors of fallen firefighters returned to share, this year’s new families came for healing and firefighters came for the remembrance.

“You are now part of our fire-service family and we are here to support you,” said Helen Worthen, whose son Eric Reiner died in 1998. “The light is a symbol of light and hope and we share that with you.”

I found inspiration in the memorial weekend’s spirit of unity. But I still struggle to understand preventable line-of-duty deaths. I propose that that the fire chief of each line of duty death be present at the Memorial weekend and escort to the family of the fallen firefighter. Watch the family members sign the remembrance banner, do a rubbing of the brass plaque or brick with their loved one’s name and escort them to receive the tri-fold American flag, the medal and the long stem rose.

“We can sleep because they do not,” Rep. Steny Hoyer said. “We don’t hope they are; we know they are.”

Is firefighter safety important? Ask Verna Wilson, Frank and Stephanie Thompson, and Helen Worthen. Buckle up, slow down and leave call response to the physically fit.